Discussion in 'Fortean News Stories' started by Anonymous, May 3, 2002.
Always check with the wife first. They generally have them.
Non smokers will rightly consider this more of a curse than a blessing but I've just found half a packet of rolling tobacco .. so nearly ten quids worth!, it was on the floor outside the primary school so I wasn't keen on going through the security gates etc to start wandering around asking if anyone had lost it lest I get on someone's nonce radar or something .. Brucey Bonus !
What sort? When I smoked I used to get either Golden Virginia or Old Holborn.
Pall Mall ... now it's Pall Mall mixed with what I had left of Gold Leaf ..
At least ya hope that's what is in the packet
I once dropped a tin of tobacco on the carpet at a biker friend’s house, so I swept it up as best as I could and never mentioned it to him.
But I had to chuck it out because it now had toenail clippings and pubes mixed in with it.
So pubes and toenail clippings were less savoury than pure tobacco?
Last year I found a pack of ciggies at work, well, a box of 10 with about 6 left. I took it home as I know a few smokers and it ended up rattling round in my car's glove box for a couple of weeks.
Eventually someone spotted it and I handed it over and forgot about it.
A while later the person told me that he'd shared the pack with a friend, who'd found a lump of weed in it!
They'd had a nice smoke together and toasted my good name in pungent fumes.
You can get a great buzz off of pubes and toenail clippings!
Uhh, err, so I’ve heard.
- Butthole Surfers, The Shah Sleeps in Lee Harvey's Grave.
Back when I smoked and went to parties there was of course the morning after - when rollies were made out of whatever you could find unsmoked in ashtrays. That woke you up in time to get to the pub for lunchtime...
And then there was the time the coke got spilled on the carpet.
The fun we had
Some inner city 6-year old will be cursing you at break time...
Well if they want a fight, they can bring it on ..
Pick the hills you're prepared to die on...
I've got some dog poo on a stick. They don't stand a chance man.
Trainee chefs have to buy their kit somewhere...
That is the uber-weapon.
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