Discussion in 'Chat' started by rynner2, Dec 31, 2007.
Larry the Cat@Number10cat
Joke’s on you FIFA, we’re now free to sign football competition deals with whoever we like... #WorldCup #ENG
9:38 PM - 11 Jul 2018
I had to think about it for a bit before I got the joke
"It's gummin gnome, It's gummin gnome" ..
.. and it's not like Skinner and Badiel can even get LP/cassette tape/CD royalties these days either, no wonder they're crying .. that's their whole 'Noddy Holder' retirement plan f****d then .. I've always hated this tune, not as much as Wonderwall though but nearly .. "and after alllllllllllllll, you're, my, wonderwallllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll"
Peter Serafinowicz adverts. Take that, spellcheck.
'Internet Ham'. LOL
"It was only when Trump drained the last of his Earl Grey and put the cup down that he realised why the Queen had been sniggering at him all afternoon ... "
If I make you breakfast in bed, a simple thank you is all I need.
None of this, "How did you get in my house?" business.
I went into the kitchen and the missus grabbed me and demanded I make passionate love to her there and then. So we did and when we were finished I said "That was a bit of a surprise."
She replied, "Well I had to think of something, the egg-timer's broken."
The bloke's a legend in that case IMO ..
Is that The President Of The United States Of America in that horseless carriage ?
Help, Swifty's turned into Jacob Rees-Mogg
I'm half way through watching Jim Jefferies new show - This Is Me Now ..
Jim's extreme comedy has got me through some dark times in the past, he was a drunkard back then and didn't hide it so his comedy was raw, painfully honest but also endearing, sometimes even elating.
I was worried that his new Netflix show This Is Me Now would be a boring born again Jim, not as funny but at least he's clean now so let's cut him slack. That's the trap he's set .. he hasn't changed at all, he's possibly even darker ..
I'd love to be able to link to this new show, I can't here but it's worth risking a computer virus to find it and watch: Jim Jefferies This Is Me Now ..
(the title this is me now came from an anecdote when both Jim and his son had the shits and pukes at the same time one night, the son woke up fresh as a daisy, walked through the disaster area and said "tough night eh Dad? .. it's funnier how Jim tells it)
I hate that feeling after surgery when you're not sure if you're asleep or awake. Or if you operated on the right patient.
Armstrong & Miller , The Origins Of -
"It's right here Ray. It's looking at me."
You can tell a Canadian is really angry when they only apologize once.
Someone asked an old man: “Even after 70 years, you still call your wife – darling, honey, luv. What’s the secret?“
Old man: “I forgot her name and I’m scared to ask her.”
If no one comes from the future to stop you from doing it, then how bad could it really be?
My name is Bill Gates and today I will be teaching you how to count to ten.
1, 2, 3, 95, 98, NT, ME, 2000, XP, Vista, 7, 8, 10.
Separate names with a comma.